Brain buzzing
no caffeine
just one million tiny bees
Poke and sting and
All day long
Whine derisive
Busy songs

The vacuum inside of me
feels like an act of nature
Published work, diplomas
Paychecks, love letters,
big black hole beats
support network wall-paper

Leather skins,
weathers growing warmer
water splashing on the tin shins
well into the winter,

Blood-bound brother senses wonder
Hidden in another's womb
Bitter ice inside my heart would make her flesh into a tomb
But if my curse is less than certain

All I ever wanted was the feeling I was good enough
How is it I keep chasing dragons that I've never even touched?

I want to carve the pieces out you've scarred into my life
But if I take my blade up then I'll be left scarred, but twice
I want to scour the things you think, the way you act, and how you look
To find the peace I had before the liberties you took

No one gives a fuck about poetry
You can't eat it, or wear it, it ain't worth a dime
And that's true despite how meticulously
You craft every syllable into its line

Yeah I wanna be your muse-
What girl wouldn't?
When you play like a God
While you pray like a Sycophant

I'm consistently so cold that I can
feel it in my teeth,
I just slept for 15 hours but
I want to go back to sleep,

They sanitized my brain and left me permanently sober
I used to be a veritable miracle of faith
They stuffed it full of hormones and then rinsed it out with bleach
So no more phone lines straight to God
And no more bleeding ink.

Shove off from shore, the whispering wake of
slipshod ships will martyrs make of
wily women with tortured tongues and
broken backs as they escape

Were that I could curl against
that tipping point
an' place my breast
my sternum rent against its edge
press down where guilty muscle's spent

Bittersweet how sweet and bitter
love can be when pretense withers
tender - like the underbelly
not like fruit that's heavy, ready,
freshly plucked your heart will seem

Coil’d round my finger, Numb,
this tiny golden snake’s begun
To flick his sweet and noxious tongue
Against my thumb, the fading thrum
My heartbeat stutters - Bum, Ba-da-Dum

I want nothing and
I trust no one
Heartbreak’s inevitable
Pour me another one
I drank up my innocence
That top shelf gullible
Now I buy that ten dollar half gallon vitriol

People think they’re badass “You’re the Joker to my Harley!”
Bitch that’s fucked up, you’re pathetic, you could be a class A medic
Super hero in your own right, stead you gonna let this broken bastard denigrate you all night?

I've been
doing everything that I can to grow
Believe the hardest thing I ever tried to do was let go
And the person who I really want to be
Who I'm gonna be

I'm not letting you fade away-
I'm betting you're strong enough.
You were the first one to inspire me,
I love the crazy that you're made of.

Childish thrones and childish thorns and I
,a child myself,
affected by your modest offerings
placed your beauty on a shelf too high for me
for I, so little,

Whisper windows to the walls,
Whisper height to fallen seed,
Whisper rain to heavy clouds,
Havest thou no word for me?